Monday, May 11, 2009

Girl Love Is...

The following is from the zine Tennis and Violins and it was written by Kristy Chan. It is taken from here:

Girl Love Is…

* treating all girls with respect
* hugging your girlfriends and being there for them
* protecting each other and providing a feeling of safety when we walk down the street or go out
* making space where women/girls feel unthreatened and unintimidated
* talking about abuse and rape when no one else will listen
* making other girls feel unafraid to eat in public or around others
* making other girls feel comfortable in their bodies
* being kind to your mom and not expecting her to wait on you
* not judging women/girls on their looks and/or hating them for being pretty
* not competing for boys’ attention
* not looking/acting dumb on purpose so boys will like you
* not picking your new boyfriend over your old girlfriends
* calling people on their shit, including your girlfriends because it helps us to stay aware of things we do that are fucked up and things we need to change
* not feeling homophobic around your girlfriends and refusing to touch them
* learning and teaching each other how to do stuff and be active
* screaming in public
* knowing that girls can do anything boys can do
* stopping jealousy
* realizing that girls who have sex aren’t “sluts” or bad and respecting their sexual choices as something that you might not understand of have any business speculating on
* being pro-choice
* knowing that you are connected to all girls and the way you view yourself is related to their self-image as well
* sharing resources with other girls
* helping each other see our beauty and build our own culture around what we see
* wearing make-up and tight clothes because we want to
* being sexy and powerful
* being honest and straight-forward with your girlfriends because mind games suck and keep us divided
* talking about our feelings
* holding hands
* feeling okay about being naked around each other * having sex and making out (if you want to) and liking it
* understanding that girls that we may not like are people, too and are affected by the same institutions that affect all of us
* not letting the words “feminist”, “slut”, “whore”, “bitch”, etc. be used as insults against us
* refusing to let companies prey on our insecurities in order to get our money (how many times have you bought some low-fat diet shit because you feel insecure about your body or bought make-up to hide your face that you think isn’t pretty?)
* trying to understand how oppression and the status quo work and how we fit into it
* reclaiming our customs and rituals (hanging out in the bathroom, slumber parties, shopping, the color pink, whatever we fucking want)
* self-love


  1. A beautiful, thoughtful, and honest post. Too bad so many women (girls) forget their roots in the Pleistocene and haven't the slightest idea of "girl love". Reclaim your feminine destiny and while you're at it, check out our site at and sound off.

  2. Hi Dr. G! Thanks for the comment! :) I just bookmarked on and I love the site!

  3. brilliant article! I'm off to go link you now! xx

  4. Really? Thanks, Hayley! Glad you like the blog enough to link to it.